Ensnared by Fear
I (Jenn) was 15 years old on September 11, 2001. I was watching the TV in the corner of Mr. Nelson's math room as the second tower crumbled and along with it the perceived safety of my childhood. The War on Drugs became the War on Terror and fear began to creep and tangle around my heart, interrupting stillness with “what if’s”. Years later as a wife and mom, my fear became more ferocious and snared me more frequently. Determined to escape fear’s hold on me I looked to scripture. I knew as a Christian I needn’t be afraid, but how? Eventually the Lord led me to 1 John 4:18, “…perfect love drives out fear…”. My love for Him certainly wasn’t perfect, but His love for me was complete. Did I really believe He was Perfect Love (I John 4:8)? Could I be sure that He does work all things for eternal good? I realized that even though I said I believed in the truth of the Bible, I was worrying as if I didn’t quite believe it all. I knew the Bible isn't a smorgasboard; I couldn't just pick and choose. I couldn't believe in Jesus' ability to redeem my soul (John 3:16) but dismiss what he had to say about his love and plan for me. I chose to start praying for faith to believe in His love. In time I came to a place where I could confidently say, that even if my darkest, most desperate fears come to pass, my God is good and He will not fail us. It was choosing faith in God’s perfect love that enabled me to trade my “what if’s” for “even if’s”. Now when I hear about suicide bombers in Beirut and Paris or extend a hand to an Arab migrant, I can say in my heart, “Even if… Lord you are good and I will follow you.” Following Jesus’ example is hard and sometimes pretty scary in times like these. I still don't walk in this faith perfectly. Tiredness or unexpected news sometimes mean I need to do battle against fear once more, but all glory to my Great God, the war is won. And you know what? He can do the same for you.
Pray With Us
Thanks for praying for Dave's health. He's kicked the bronchitis at last and none of the rest of us have been sick. The annual middle school musical takes place this weekend. It is a melodrama this year and the A-team (our kids) is so excited! Please pray with us for the safety of the students and that the event would point to Jesus. One of the lead characters has lost her voice, so you can pray especially for her.
